hello....
This two days really sux... :( Went JB with ann nee mei ytd... Wanted to really have a peace of mind before i entered JB, just before i wanted to go take the train.
My boss siok feng sent a wadapp text to me, never will i guessed, she asked me did i take any of her kenzo armor perfume ? if yes please return. I WAS LIKE WHAT WHAT ! i told her i never and i will never do it. She say in that case she would have to open CCTV! i say go ahead... after that my bigger boss farien called. I WAS LIKE i knew sf did not believe in me... hais... after working for kenzo for half a year. All i recieved was this.? FUCK MY LIFE ! hais... really very depressed to get suspected. i was trying to tell her i will never do it for the sake of my future. i dont want to get retained by a small piece of perfume. she said she believed me and wanted me to explain to sf. i was saying oh okay... After that she complained about my sales, she say why would your sales be worst of than a new comer. YOU REALLY THINK I DONT WANT TO SELL!
my luck was really dropping. when im around, i just couldnt serve any much customers. Not that i dont want. I need money too you know. HAIS! she told me about the consequences if i still couldnt sell. :( Hais.... thinking about it. i can die. tml CP ! where got sales....DIE LA!

CAN SOMEONE GIVE ME SOME LUCK! 


Then today was another hurtful day...went down to rc , wanted to pei april mei eat dinner, in the end, sf called her to go eat earlier... so she did... so i was already otw down... ended up eating alone in soup spoon. quite pathetic. :( hais... then kana reprimanded by her for asking april mei to have dinner during peak hr... WTF! yea yea all my fault when my sales is bad. WHAT U WANT! hais....
im really very pissed off with myself for my bad sales. i know im lousy! thank you yea. hais...

SORRY FOR RANTING! i cant tell anyone how i felt but write down how hurt my heart is...
I FEEL SO USELESS AND BAD ! i cant do anything about it but to write down all my pain here.

I NEED SOME NEW SPACE TO BREATH! 
i want to bury myself and stop thinking ! 




sometimes i wonder, who truly loves me? i cant feel the love you know. :( im just alone with nobody.